29 Weeks

Bruno is trying to sympathize. He's showing you all what momma looks like everyday. I don't think this is a cold, I think it's allergies. Which is good I guess, but I still feel like crap! I wish I could breathe while I am eating. Right now it's just a stuffy nose and watery eyes so I am going through tissues like crazy.

The doctors appointment went well today. I've gained another pound, putting me at 134. The doctor was excited because she could feel the baby when she was trying to measure my belly. Then when she put the doppler on her she kicked the doctor, lol. It was so cute. She's such an active little baby. The doctor thinks it's because I'm small, and it makes it easier to feel her every movement. I swear some days this girl just doesn't stop moving.
I go back in 2 weeks again and the doctor wants me to bring a birth plan. Has anyone else had to write one of these? I've read about them on the baby sites but some say that the hospital staff doesn't like them because they make the parents think that things will just go exactly as they plan out. (which we all know isn't what really happens) Ian and I are kind of a "go with the flow" kind of couple, so I wasn't really planning on having a birth plan but I guess now I will. However, I have a feeling it will be pretty vague.

Updated: I don't understand why the pictures aren't working. The worked when I first uploaded the post, but now they don't! I'll try to fix it later.

Fun Times

Ugh, I'm working on another cold. Yuck! Sore throat, stuffy/runny nose, can't sleep more than 5 minutes at a time. Horrible chapped/dried lips, just Yuck. Sleeping is so frustrating because I just can't get comfortable, my throat hurts and my nose clogs up. This morning I got up just so I didn't have to deal with it. I'm tired but I seem to feel better when I'm up than I do in bed.

SNOW! It won't stop! Last week all our snow melted away, well not all of it but you could actually see the lawn in some spots. Then the snow started Friday and still hasn't stopped. By Sunday we had about a foot. Yesterday it started up again around noon. This morning, it's snowing again! Then I think it's supposed to get warm again by the end of the week. This north east weather is crazy! Spring offically starts tonight, or tomorrow or something. (Updated: Apparently spring starts at 8:07pm tonight...weird)Maybe today will finally be the last of our snow.

Speaking of snow. Mike, Mary and the kids came over on Sunday and the boys went snowmobiling. Ian is hooked! As I sit here this morning I can still smell the lingering of Ben Gay all over the couch. LOL. Poor guy is so sore, but somehow I don't think it would stop him from going back out in a heartbeat. The up side is that the menthol in the Ben Gay is helping my stuffy nose, lol.

The baby is doing well, jumping all around. Very active. We go to the doctor again on Thursday.

Ok, I'll try to get a 29 week picture up soon, but for now it's back to the OJ and box of tissues. Happy Spring everyone!

It's all in the angles

LOL, Ian just about passed out when he saw the photo in the last post. I took 3 pictures and that was the one I chose to post. You see depending on what angle I stand at and take the pic, my belly looks totally different. It seems to be shaped funny. Not completely round. So when I take a picture from the side you can see that my belly is shaped like a plateau. It comes out rounded and goes in rounded, but the middle is flat. It's weird, here's the other shot from yesterday so you can see what I'm saying.

Either way, the belly is getting pretty big.
I bought my fat lady bathing suit yesterday, yay! I don't really care how fat I look, I am so excited to go to the water park in April! Mike, Mary and the kids went last weekend and I'm so jealous! It's going to be so much fun! I'll probably spend most of the time just taking pictures, but still, I love it there!
I also got a cute pair of Christmas pj's for the baby at Old* N@vy yesterday for $0.47!! They are so cute and I just couldn't resist for 47 cents!
Scott is supposed to be starting baseball soon. I really hope he plays. The season was supposed to start last week but apparently they've postponed it. Although, Scott isn't the most attentive child so I have a slight feeling that they have started and he just doesn't know it. Hopefully we'll find out something next week. His mother doesn't seem too supportive of him playing, not sure why, but I wish she would encourage him more.
He got his 5 week grades this week. He was failing 3 classes last marking period. This time it's just Spanish. He's managed to bring the other grades back up but only to the minimum. It's so frustrating because he knows the material and he does the work, but he doesn't hand anything in! He does his homework every night and it gets checked and then he goes to school and doesn't hand it in, so he gets a zero. I don't understand how we can get him to be more aware and remember when he's in school. At this point it is no longer the teachers responsibility to ask him if he handed it in. He has to do it on his own, and he just doesn't. It's killing me.
Plus, his mother seems to believe that he should be held back this year. Whether he fails or not. I can see where she's coming from but I think it's too late for that now. If they were going to hold him back they should have done it years ago, not now. Scott is a year younger than everyone else in his class and has struggled with immaturity his whole educational career, but right now the boys his age are all fighting to find their place in their little society and I think that holding him back will hinder this. There are so many factors that go into my opinions and so much more that I have to say, but as the Step-Mom it doesn't really matter what I think. I don't have much of a say. Ian listens to my concerns and opinions, but he has his own as well.
This is sure to be an interesting next couple years for Scott, it is tough for a boy to go from a boy to a young man and these are those deciding years. I just hope that those who love him make the right decisions for him.

28 Weeks

HUGE!!

Class

Our first Child birth class went well. The beginning was a little rough and it was getting very long. We have it every Thursday from 6pm to 8pm for 6 weeks. The instructor announced that she will be going to Oregon to visit her granddaughter one week so we'll have a week off at the end of the month, the men rejoiced wishing she were staying in Oregon for 2 weeks instead of one.
The beginning of the class was all about the anatomy of the mother and where everything was located and is now located and how the baby pushes everything out of the way.
We did good. A few giggles under our breath and we couldn't look each other in the eye for fear of hysteria, but we held our own. Then came the break...
The instructor brought out juice and cookies and granola bars for us to snack on. As I was finishing my juice, Ian got up to get one for himself (he wouldn't take anything until everyone else had, such a gentleman.) He sat down next to me and opened his and took a sip. As I was finishing up my juice I noticed that it should have been "Shaken rigorously" So I look over at Ian and say "Make sure you shake it REAL good" He looks at me puzzled, and says "I already opened it..." (Note: they were little individual juice cups with the foil top that you have to peel back, not replaceable caps) Well, those simple words sent me into a fit of laughter that I could not get out of. I turned purple trying to hold it in, I had uncontrollable tears rolling down my face, and I. Could. Not. Stop.
It was awful and embarrassing and lasted for a good 8 or 9 minutes...at least! Everyone was looking at me, I couldn't stop, I couldn't catch my breath and I had a napkin over my eyes to try and catch some of the uncontrollable tears, it was like fountains people!

Well, once I finally contained myself to low grade convulsions and the instructor put in a video. Still shaking with laughter I managed to keep myself quite enough to see the video. Then we moved on to a few breathing techniques and that was it.

So we made it through the first class and hopefully I can be more mature at the next class, lol.

God, this memory loss is killing me! I had like 3 other things to post about, and now they're gone! Ugh, I can't stand not being able to remember anything. I'm going to have to start writing everything down.

Doctor's visit

Today I weighed in at 133lbs. Which means I've gained another 4 lbs this month. That would put me at a total of 15 pounds so far and that 30 that the doctor said I should gain is not too far off. We only have 3 months left, but from what everyone is telling me that is when you gain the most. So at the minimum if I only gained what I've been gaining, which is 5 pounds a month, that would put me right at 30. However, I think these next 3 months might be a bit more than 5 lbs each. I guess we'll have to wait and see.

We listened to the heartbeat, she's still going strong. The doctor said that because I'm so "petite" that she always finds my beat first and then the two together and it's harder to get just the baby. LOL, I certainly don't feel too petite these days.
We measured the belly and she is finally measuring right on track with the number of weeks. The past times that she had measured me the belly was always just a little behind, but now she's caught up, which made the doctor happy. I'm not exactly sure how the belly was measuring smaller, and when we had the ultrasound the baby was measuring bigger. But as long as everything is healthy I'm good.

The doctor's office received all our information on the Cord Blood Banking and seemed to know what they are doing now. They don't have many patients in this office that have ever done it so I think we may be their guinea pigs. It made me feel good that everyone was on top of it though and was aware of the steps we need to take on the big day.

My glucose and blood tests came back great so no diabetes!! Thank God, I'm not sure how women handle being on a diabetic diet at this time. I know that it would have been really hard for me. But to be safe I do still eat healthy and I've started exercising too. I've never been a big fitness person, or exercised alot, but now with not working I don't want to just sit around and get fat. At work I was going all the time, constantly on my feet and moving. Now my days consist of a laptop, Discover Health network, a little TLC, and eating. Well, there's laundry and cleaning thrown in there, but still I know I'm not getting the activity that my body is used to.

I think that's all the doctor had to say...we won't be getting another ultrasound, unless there are unforeseen circumstances in the future. Judged on where I'm feeling the most movement, the baby is still head down, which is good, but the doctor says she still has plenty of room to flip all around. Trust me that room is slimming! This morning I could feel her butt poke up at the top of my belly. It was pretty cool to feel her slide on up and feel this adorable little round rump right at the top, then she felt the need to kick me too. She likes to kick back when I am feeling where she is.

Gosh, I'm just so excited! I hope these next few months fly by. I go back to the doctor every 2 weeks now until around 36 weeks then it will be every week.

Well, it's off for some lunch now. Our class is tonight after Ian gets out of work, I'll try to post about it tomorrow. Wish us luck.

27 weeks

So I guess it wasn't just the angle. There was quite a difference in the last two belly shots so here's week 27. As you can see the belly has certainly gotten a lot bigger! She's growing like a weed in there and quickly running out of room.
It's probably only a matter of weeks before my belly button pops, yikes! My stomach is SO tight, I really don't know how she's going to make it another 12 weeks in there. Sometimes it hurts so bad that I litterally have to hold my stomach because it feels like she's going to pop right threw. My belly button is starting to look bruised all around it. I'm afraid that stretch marks might be coming, and I lather up with the lotion at least twice a day.
Today I had to go for my glucose test. Wish me luck. I see the doc on Thursday so she should have the results by then.
We also start our first class Thursday night. We have class every Thursday for 6 weeks. I'm very excited. Ian's meeting got rescheduled so he will be able to make it to class with me. He'll have to miss out some other week, but at least he'll be there for the first one.

The baby is moving like crazy. You can see my whole belly jump when she starts kicking. Ian's parents got to see her kicking last week, they were pretty amazed.

She used to only kick on the sides, but today I can feel her moving in the front. Rubbing her toes and knees across my belly button. It's pretty gross. I've always hated my belly button touched, and being touched from the inside is no better!

I love being able to rub my belly and feel where she is. She switches sides often and you can tell the difference. She seems to prefer my right side, right under my ribs which I keep pushing her out of because it hurts.

I keep forgetting everything I want to blog about. I get ideas but then they're gone.
Scott is getting more and more excited and continues to talk about the baby every weekend. He even suggested we buy her more outfits this weekend, lol. He's hoping that he's with us when she comes. I hope so too, I think it would be so great to have him there the day she's born. He's going to be an awesome big brother, she's a lucky girl.

Here's the 26 week shot. Every belly shot i took came out blurry! Oh well, maybe I'll take a few more but this will do for now.

More adorable gifts!! Thank you so much Dana and Nick!! This is her first I love mommy shirt! I'm so excited. The little pink onesie "Worth the Wait" is so perfect! I don't know how I'm going to decide what to dress her in first.

I have more to blog about, but I'm kinda busy right now and I wanted to get these pics in. I'll try to update more later...

Holy crap Picasa actually let me upload pictures again and it didn't take 3 hours to do so! It's a miracle!I just thought I'd throw you a couple of pics that I had sitting in the camera. These are from the snow storm last week. Look at the side of the barn! And our wishing well is buried! The snow came all the way up to the middle of the front door. We just got about another foot last night. The past couple of days had been beautiful and it was starting to melt away and then boom, another foot. Crazy lake effect snows out here.

This is a picture of the boys having tater tots for breakfast the other day. They were laughing at me and couldn't figure out why I was taking pictures of them. Scott looks really good in hats but he never wears them so I wanted to get a good shot of him with it on, but they wouldn't look at me :(

And finally, here's the 25 week belly shot. Growing bigger by the day!

I'm loving being at home. Today is Ian's day off and it's so nice being able to spend time with him again and not have to spend our whole day off cleaning and doing laundry. This morning we drove out to Cooperstown and walked around and had lunch at a nice little cafe/pub. It was a nice little place and reminded us of the bar we ate in on one of the islands in Hawaii.
We even managed to put the crib together today! We've only had it since Christmas, lol. I'm excited to set her room up and get her stuff ready, but now with not working and having 3 months left I think I better pace myself or I'm going to get bored real quick.

Updated: Ok, so Picasa didn't work, big surprise! But I fixed it. Here's your pics.

Day 1

So today is day 1 as a stay at home wife. Actually I get to play the stay at home Step-mom for the next few days since Scott doesn't have school this week. Did you know that a 12 year old can talk for about 20 hours straight. Not kidding! We're enjoying our relaxing time off together. He's no longer sick, lucky! I on the other hand still feel like I have been continuously backed over by a Mac truck.
Is is odd that my doctors office tries to treat you right over the phone? I called to make an appointment and the receptionist put me through to the nurse. She asks me the usual questions, just like I was sitting on the paper sheet in front of her. She takes some notes and says "I'll talk to the doc and someone will call you back shortly." That seems weird to me. Don't they want to listen to my lungs and take my blood pressure and all that good stuff? As long as it works and what ever they give me is safe for the baby.

Well I have a bunch of running around to do this afternoon....oh shoot, it's a holiday. Is the bank open today? I guess I'll have to go down and find out. I think I should wait to hear back from the docotor first though because she's probably going to call in a script for me.
I have to go down to the vet and collect a bunch of paper work so I can get the dogs licenced and avoid the $50 fee from them getting out last week.

Does anyone else have a preteen with a Wii? Do you believe that it creates false self esteem? Ian brought up this debate the pther day and I have to say that I fully agree that it does. Scott believes that he is next to God when he plays Wii sports. I think I should video tape him so he can see how spastic he actually looks. He thinks he's so cool and athletic, lol. It's so funny to watch. Everytime he does good he throws his arms up in the air and does a victory dance saying how great he is.
Either way it's still better than laying around playing shoot 'em up games.

Full time Blogger

That is my new ocupation. That's right. I've quit my job. Not quite sure what I was thinking. Maybe it's the fact that I feel like shit, or that my desk has been flooded for a week, or that it was raining in the bathroom when I got there and leaking out into the hallway with a huge puddle and all they could muster up was to put up a wet floor sign. Or maybe it's the fact that I recieve numerous phone calls reminding me to breathe while I'm at work because you know I am a complete moron and might forget to do that. Or maybe it was the fact that Ian was stuck at work and it's our weekend with Scott and niether of us could go get him. Maybe it was a culmination of all these things. Who knows. But I handed in my keys and said have a nice night.

Now I have to deal with the reality and the financial stress that will come next week. One thing at a time though for now.

The dogs are doing ok. They both have frost bite :( Bruno is limping all around because in between his toes are frost biten (is that a word?) Poor Patches has frost bite on her nipples! OUCH! They seem to be ok with is but they're not to fond of going outside just yet. I have to force them to go out to go to the bathroom.

Well, goodnight for now. Wish me luck in my retirement.

They're home!

The dogs are home. They made it to a carn that was about 4 miles from our house and the dog catcher picked them up tuesday night. He brought them home tonight. They both need baths, Bruno's feet are all sore and red. But over all they are good. I feel so much better having them back.
We've been buried with snow. I don't think I've ever seen this much snow in my life. The snow is half way up our front door! Ian made a path from the doggy door to the driveway. The snow is way over the dogs head so the only place they can go is into the driveway.

I've been horribly sick for the last 2 days. Stuck in bed. No appetite, no energy everything hurts. This sucks! It hurts so bad to even breathe. I can't talk, no voice. Ian got me some Robitussin DM and saline nasal spray that seem to be approved for use during pregnancy. Hopefully they'll work for me.

Blogger made me switch! What the heck! Why do I HAVE to have the new blogger? I liked the old one just fine.

Ok, back to bed. I'm gonna go cuddle up with my smelly dogs. Goodnight.

Tears

The dogs are missing! They've been gone since sometime late Saturday night. I've been in tears everyday. Mostly because I'm scared for them, then because I miss them. It's been cold and then there is the 3 feet of snow and another potential 3 feet tonight.

I've called the vet, the Humane Society, and the local police. Nothing! I can only hope that someone has taken them in and is loving on them, or that they have found decent shelter in one of the many barns around here. God please watch over them. The thought of them out there in danger or hurting just kills me inside and brings endless tears. I love them. They've been my babies for almost 4 years and I miss them terribly. I just need to know. If they are ok, I'll be delighted, if they're not I will grieve but I would need that closure. It's like torture not knowing.

The baby girl is kicking up a storm, she's a little Mia Hamm in there. (no that's not the name we choose)

Today she felt the need to try and play the xylaphone on my ribs. It hurt! She's done it about 4 times now. My belly is jumping all over the place, you can see it even through my shirt now. She kicks that hard!

I have a cold. I feel like crap, can't stop coughing, chest and throat are killing me. Yuck!

Ian and I finally made it out to register. It was so much fun picking out stuff for our baby girl.

I go back to the Dr. March 8th. It is also our first birthing class. Ian will be in Jersey for a meeting and I will have to go alone, that sucks! I'm so dissapointed. I really want him there, and I know that he will be for all the other ones, but this is our first and I don't want to be alone, especially since I have no idea what to expect.

Ok, that's all I can think of for now...here's some belly pics to hold you over...

It's getting BIG!

Docs and Pics

Today we had another Doctor's appointment. Everything went well. The belly is still measuring on track and I've gained a total of 11 pounds so far. The doctor wants me to gain 30-35 pounds! I think that's a little on the high side for a goal, but we'll see what happens. I'm still eatting good and still gaining so I intend to just let nature take it's course and we'll see where I end up. All the books I've read say 25-30 is normal, I know I'm small but it's not like I was underweight to begin with so I'm not sure why she's shooting for the higher ends.
I go back in March and I have to do my Glucose testing the week of my next appointment. Other than that it was all pretty routine.

Ian and I made our trip to IHOP after the appointment and had a yummy breakfast. Then it was off to Home Depot to get a new shower head for the bathroom, I wanted one with the detatchable handle for washing the baby in the tub. Then we went to Barnes and Noble for awhile and then headed to a local baby store to get some ideas. I'm hoping to go to register on Sunday. It sucks that we have to drive over an hour and a half to get to a real baby store, but I can't wait to go. We shopped around the baby store here just looking for some ideas, but it's really rather small and they didn't have too much and everything they did have was very expensive.

Nothing else is really going on around here. It's been snowing everyday. We have about a total of 3 feet right now. The snow drifts here are crazy! Plowing is really a lost cause because all the snow just gets blown right back into the road. It's so bad that we've actually seen a few houses by us that plow thier front yards to avoid the snow piling up past their doors...seriously! They do. The snow out front is just about over the dogs heads. They have to hop through the front yard. Patches doesn't mind, she loves the snow. Bruno on the other hand is not very happy and will usually only go out through the garage and then he comes right back in.

The baby girl is getting spoiled. I can't seem to help buying her something at least once a week. I try hard not to but it's just so tempting. Today Ian bought her some baby hangers for her closet that he has customized and we got her some of those cute headbands with the bows on them.

Here are a few of her other latest gifts:

Daddy's presents from Vegas


Ian says she can never have enough I Love Daddy stuff.

An Adorable out fit from Ev, Chris, and Baby Chris (AKA her boyfriend)
This is a huge box of clothes that Ev had shipped to us just hours after we found out she was a girl!

And finally the latest belly shot. You can see the dark circles in my eyes, yuck! This shot really doesn't do the belly justice, it's so much bigger in real life!

Belly Dancer

This weeks lesson must be Salsa. They don't mention anything about in the womb dance classes on any of my pregnancy calendars, but I swear there is one. Today she was dancing on my inner most parts and creating quite the ruckus, so much so that I actually started laughing out loud and asking her to stop it. It's so weird! Today was definitely the weirdest feelings so far. I think she's getting to big and running out of room in there, and she doesn't seem to happy about it. She'll poke the same spot 4 or 5 times in a row, almost like knocking on the walls to tell them to open up. It's so funny.

Have you ever walked into a room in your house and reached for the light switch in an odd spot? I don't know what it is about this house but every now and then I'll walk into a room and swipe the wall to turn on the light, only the light switch is no where near where I look for it. I mean not even the same wall! In the beginning I just wrote it off as getting used to a new house, but now after living here for just over 6 months (Wow it's been 6 months!) you would think I would have it down...but no. Everyday is an adventure in the life of Kari, I swear!

Ok that's it for today, just a quick note to tell you all about the salsa dance going on in my belly and the brain cells that can't hold the memory of a light switch.

I hope you're all enjoying the Super Bowl. Us country folk can't get local channels out here in the boondocks :( We've actually petitioned to get local channels via satellite, but the only two that granted us permission were Fox and ABC and the local news is out of New Jersey!!! Go figure. New Jersey, NYC, upstate central NY it's all the same right?

The sweetest thing

My husband. He is indeed the sweetest thing. He has fallen full on, head over heels in love with his daughter. I think that although he's been preparing himself for a girl since the moment we found out I was pregnant, the realization was still quite a shock.

He's back from Vegas and I'm still working so you can all guess how that went. He had a good time though so I'm glad he finally got a break and got to relax a little. He works so many hours and provides everything for us, he deserves to take time out for himself.

He came home bearing gifts for all of us, he's so sweet. He even got two pink Vegas onsies for the baby girl.

He told me the other day that I am no longer the #1 girl in his life :( Move over Mama here comes the baby girl! He even told the dog that she cannot be the baby girl and that basically everyone needs to move over because the new love in his life will be here in a few short months.

It's amazing to see him falling in love with the baby, and she's not even here yet. I feel so blessed. I'm so surrounded by love and filled with unsurmountable love in so many ways. I cannot wait to see Scott fall in love with her too. I think it's still hard for him because he can't see her. I'm sure the ultrasound pics are just really wierd to him too. I know that he is very excited and it is just going to be amazing to see him with the baby when she's here.

My Mom went out and bought me a bunch of new maternity clothes. Thanks Mom!! I needed them really bad. My regular clothes are pretty much out of the question at this point. The belly is getting so big everyday. She seems to be moving a little less frequently, but I can definatly tell she is growing because her movements are more intense. You can see the movements sometimes if you watch my belly. Today I was laying with my arm on my belly and I could feel her kicking me and my arm moving.

The back pain comes and goes. It is the worst when I get home from work and sit on the couch and then try to get up. It hurts to walk! Last night I had 2 more leg cramps and woke up screaming. It hurts! Ian was more supportive this time and didn't just roll over, lol.

I'm still hungry at least every 2 hours but it hasn't been as painful as it was a few weeks ago. Not craving anything. I actually have a hard time deciding what to eat because I'm really not in the mood for anything I'm just hungry. I've been eating pretty healthy and I still like healthy foods but the junk is tasting good too. In the begining I had no desire for ice cream or chips or anything like that. I still haven't had alot of junk food cravings, maybe once a week. It makes for a nice little treat.

I don't feel like I have that pregnancy glow. I have these dark circles under my eyes that just don't seem to go away. I used to never wear makeup, but now I feel like if I don't put some on I look half dead! I think that this little girl inside is stealing what beauty I had, lol.

I've been dying to go register. Ian and I have yet to have a day off together and I really want to do this together so it will have to wait. I think I've seen all there is to see on the internet and I have almmost everything I want picked out, but I really want to see it all in person. Plus, I don't want to register for every thing that can only be found online.

I took a belly shot in the bathroom mirror. It looks so much bigger when I look at it in the mirror than it ever seems to turn out in the pics. So you can all see how much she is gowing every week. I go back to the Dr. on the 8th, I'm sure I've more than doubled my weight gain by this point.


UGGG!! Pics won't post!!! Stupid blogger!

Finally, it posted!

21 weeks

The belly continues to get bigger everyday. It's finally starting to get that round pregnant look.
I had to go back to the place I trained in back in for work and everyone there noticed. I was all smiles all day. They were all so happy for me and wouldn't let me lift a finger all day, lol. It was funny to see them noticing but afraid to ask. One brave soul finally asked, she said "Are you...umm (rubs her belly) or did you just have too many donuts this morning?" Others just stared at my belly every time they talked to me and were to afraid to ask.
The simple things in life are starting to get more difficult by the day. Such as, putting on your socks, rolling over in bed (which is now a 12 step thought out process and not just a natural reaction) getting off the couch, and going up stairs. I've only just begun to finally show and I'm really going to be in for it in the months to come.
Lately I've been in pain. Just achy all over. My hips and my back are killing me, I have to sit down from time to time at work and regain my strength. I wish I had something to constantly rub my hips and lower back because that is the only way I can function. I walk around all day rubbing my back, my hips, or my belly. It's the only thing that helps.
I am CONSTANTLY hungry! It won't stop. I eat at least every 2 hours and if I don't I feel like I am going to die! I feel sick and ache and just want to stuff my face with the forst thing I see. This makes being at work very difficult. I feel like my entire day is spent eating or peeing.
It looks as though I will be sticking it out until the end at work :( I am taking an extra day off each week for the next 3 weeks and then I am taking a week off in April. So I'll have to make it about 7 weeks and then I put in to take the 3rd week in May off, so that will be 4 or 5 weeks in between and then I should be out for maternity leave anyway. We'll see how it goes. It gets harder and harder to stay everyday. Work sucks!
Ian leaves for Vegas this weekend, hopefully he'll win a bunch of money and I can quit next week, lol. Does anyone win in Vegas? Wish him luck!

Here's the belly shot from week 21:
Well blogger isn't cooperating so the pic will have to wait.

Beautiful day!

Unbelievable! I just wrote a huge post outlining every minute detail about today and the internet went down and now it's all gone!!!! I hate that! So now you'll all get the much shorter version of what I just spent 34 minutes writing in extreme detail, sorry.

Ian and I had a wonderful morning together.
Doctor's-Breakfast-Shopping-Doctor's-Lot's of phone calls-Lot's of smiles-Work-and home together-Bottle of champain for Ian, pickles for me, lol.

Amazing views of our baby!
Loved every minute of it.
Due date changed from the 4th to the 2nd.
Baby weighs 14 oz.
Everything looks perfect.
Baby is very skwirmy and loves to kick and move.
The tech made us wait until Ian couldn't take it any more.
We all took a look.
We all thought the same thing.
Finished with measurements.
Went back for another look.
The tech's exact words......
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"I see no evidence of a penis"
Ian and I chuckle.
At the end we go back for one final look and again all agree.

IT'S A GIRL!!!

We only got 2 pics to take with us. One is of the face, rather alien looking, we took this one because as we were all looking at the baby she openend her mouth and it was like she was smiling, maybe she was yawning, either way it was cute; and the other is the belly and her long legs that I feel skwirming all the time. The tech thought it was adorable how she was layign with her legs crossed like this. LOL. Too cute!

It's Growing

That's the info I have for you. A whole lot of NOTHING!

No ultrasound today :( I was crushed! I was looking forward to this for 4 weeks...well actually 19.....well more like 2 years, but who's counting. We had to schedule another appointment with the imaging center to get the ultrasound done. So it should be about a week and we'll find out. Let's just hope the baby cooperates.

So today we just did all the routine stuff peeing, weighing, measuring and listening. Everything is good. I've gained 5lbs. which made the doctor happy but she likes to emphasize the eating in every appointment.

I asked the doctor if I could switch offices and go to her other office but she said it's not really an option. I can switch doctors, but 1) I love my doctor and 2) no one else around here will take new pregnancies! Don't ask me what's up with that because it makes no sense to me but when I call the offices that's what they tell me. I'm just going to have to suck it up and put blinders on when I go in the office. All of the staff at the office are great, it's just the other patients that I don't like. In CT the OB office was always so cheery and happy and full of excitement and expectation, this office in NY is more full of misery. It's an awful feeling. You can tell that 75% of the people there don't want to be pregnant and the next 20% probably shouldn't be prego. Then there's the 5% that I fall into, although I could be off on that one since I've only seen one other person who actually looked pleased and possibly excited to be seeing the doctor.

I definitely don't want to give up my doc, I just wish I could change the environment of the whole experience

So back to the weight thing. I'm definitely gaining now. My jeans finally don't fit anymore...well at least not comfortably. I've tried to buy maternity jeans but none of them fit me right either :(

I'll try to take a belly shot tonight and post it.

The baby is still moving like crazy. Ian finally got to feel it for the first time last night. His face light up with amazement, it was great! It's hard to sit still and not let it be known when I feel the baby move. I just love it so much that I am overwhelmed with smiles and joy. Sometimes it surprises me and I jump or make a funny face.

I can't wait to get the crib set up and go register. Ian bought a custom closet kit for the baby's room, I love it.

Just so excited....now I have to wait all over again to find out if the little one is a boy or a girl.

Locks of Love

Well today starts my 19th week, and my first real day off post holiday. I drove out to meet Mary and Ryleigh for lunch at the Olive Garden (Thanks Mary!) Yum Yum! Then it was off to the hair salon.
I can't remember if I had started the blog yet when I did this last time, but 2 years ago I cut off 12 inches and donated it to Locks for Love. I felt it was time again so I made the cut and there was no turning back. My hair is SO short now! I've never had my hair this short before...well, at least not since I was like 8 and even then it was only short for one year. This is shockingly new for me.

After the cut I went to my mom's work to surprise her and I guess she was surprised since she didn't even know who I was! It took her a minute and a triple take to realize it was me! LOL

Ian's exact words upon arriving home were, "What have you done?!" He said he didn't recognize me either when he walked in. Total Shock!
Hehehehe. I like it so far, I'm just not used to the shortness and no ponytail. So what do you think? Here are the before and afters:

The belly again

Here's another pic of the belly, still not looking too much bigger. Our scale broke last week so I don't know where I stand as far as the weight is going. I go to the doctor on Thursday the 11th so I guess we'll know then. I'm hoping that we'll get the ultrasound to find out the gender. I'm sure my phone will be ringing non stop that day. I promise to post after the appointment.
I'm feeling the baby move everyday. Today I actually felt it while I was standing up, a first! I usually can only feel it when I'm sitting down. This is SO amazing! I'm loving every minute of it! We've listened to the heart beat again a couple of times but the baby doesn't like to stay still for the doppler. Still strong and in the mid 150's.

Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had a fun, safe night. I was in bed by 9pm and didn't get up until 8:30 the next morning! A great way to start off the new year! The dogs woke me up at 12:03am with there barking, lol it was like they were celebrating. But then it was right back to sleep.

I had my first leg cramp last night. OMG! Let's hope it's my only one. My leg has been sore all day! I scared the crap out of Ian when I shot up in bed and was almost screaming in pain. He asked me what was wrong and I said " My leg, Ahhhhh! My leg...I...have...agggghhhhh...cramp in my leg!" To which he said "Your leg? Jeez you scared the crap out of me I thought something was wrong!" and he rolled over and went back to sleep!!! Um, yeah something is wrong my leg is in extreme pain!!

Ouch.

Oh yeah, here's the belly shot of the day:

There's a bump!

My first maternity outfit! How exciting. You're finally starting to see a bump too. This morning I definatly felt the baby move. It was awesome! I've felt it a few times here and there for a couple weeks but wasn't sure if it was really the baby or just gas or some kind of flutter. Last night we used the doppler to hear the babies heartbeat and as soon as I put the doppler to my belly where the baby was I felt it move! It was incredible. I've noticed that if I am sitting down after I eat I can usually feel it. Yesterday I ate breakfast and then left the house to go to the mall and I felt it in the car. Same thing today. I left for work and was starving so I stopped to get a bagel and some chocolate milk and once I drank some of the milk I felt the baby move.
Christmas was incredible this year. We had the whole family here and I loved every stressful minute of it. Julie and Keith even drove up from NC and surprised us on Christmas day...well almost, my FIL ruined the surprise about an hour before they showed up, lol. It was still an amazing surprize and it was so awesome to have my whole family and Ian's whole family here together.
I hope everyone enjoyed there holiday and has a wonderful New Year! I'll be working of course, lol. New year's eve and New year's Day...lucky me I get to work every holiday until this baby is born! Have I mentioned how much I hate work lately? Well, it hasn't changed. Still hate it more and more everyday. Most days I wish that I hated the people I worked with because it would make it so easy to quit, but I like them and they work hard and put up with the same bullshit day after day so I feel obligated to suck it up and deal with it for them. Only a few short months left...

Stupid blogger! I wrote out this whole post with pic and everything and it's gone!! UGH!
I give up. Here's the pics.
16week belly shot.
Scott's basketball game
I still don't know how to use my camera!
Hope this posts... 

Doctor's Appointment

Today was our second Doctor's appointment. We had the first appointment of the day so I thought we'd be in and out quick, lol. Nothing in that office is quick. We waited in the waiting room for awhile but not nearly as long as we had to wait last time. It's not so bad though because our neighbor is the receptionist at the office so it gives us a chance to catch up with her a bit.
So we get called back, weigh in, pee in the cup and do the blood pressure.
The best part about this office is definatly the doctor. You never have to wait once you get back to your room, she comes right away and when she leaves the office and says "I'll be right back." She comes right back! In like less than a minute! Remarkable! I love our doctor, she's young, very nice, listens to our thoughts, answers our questions and is just fun.
Anyway, the doctor comes in and then I get in trouble. She takes my blood pressure again (the nurse took it twice!) and it's ok, but low. It's always low, always has been, for as long as I can remember. Then we go over my weight. Apparently I have only gained one pound in the last 4 weeks. I am coming into 5 months and have only gained a pound since the start. Not good. I eat like crazy, I swear I do. I always have, I just don't gain weight. I've never gained weight. My brothers could never gain weight, still can't. It's just my genes, I can't help it. So now she said I need to check my weight and in two weeks I should have gained at least 2 more pounds. I should gain a pound a week at least before I go back. I think the fact that I am constantly going and on my feet at work all day has played a part too. It's hard to snack at work because we're just so busy right now. But I have been eating! Now Ian is trying to force me to eat double of everything and I feel like I'm going to explode! I'm so incredibly full. Eat, Eat, Eat! Hopefully I can put on the weight. The doctor said that usually they start measuring the belly at this point but I really still don't have anything to measure so we'll wait until next time. :(
We listened to the heart beat, still in the 150's. She found it right away this time which was funny because right before she started she said "Now remember last time it took us a little bit to find it so don't hit me if we don't get it right away" LOL. As soon as she placed the doppler on my belly you could hear it, her face lit up with surprise, it was so funny.
I asked her if she was able to get the pictures from the hospital and she said that she was not, I told her again that they didn't give them to us either and she said "Really?...Hold on one second." and she left the room. She came back in with the ultrasound machine and took some pictures for us and even gave us doubles so Ian could bring them back to work with him. We only took the two pictures but the 3 of us watched the baby for a bit. It wasn't moving around alot like it was when we had the ER ultrasound done, but then you could see the baby swallowing! It was amazing! You could actually see the cheeks move and the baby swallow! It was so funny because Ian and Scott both make this noise when they sleep like they are smacking their lips together and swallowing and that's exactly what it looked like the baby was doing.

Ok I think I've rambled on long enough. We go back again on Jan. 14th. I think she will probably send us over to the ultrasound unit that day to get another one and we should be able to find out the gender! Exciting! I'm still feeling like it's a boy, but everyone else is saying girl. Only time will tell!

Here's the pics... You can see the arm and hand pretty good in the first one, the second one the hand is up by the nose/mouth area, you could see it really good on the sceen but the pics didn't come out as good. You can see the legs too, a little. I can't stop staring at these!


 

Rambling

Feeling kind of achey today :(
Trying to take it easy and just take my time with everything. I wish I had more time at home to catch up on things, but when I am home all I want to do is rest...so that's what I do. Thank God for Ian or I'm sure our house would be really trashed. I look forward to the days of being home with the new baby, I'm SO excited!

Work has been crazy, Ian and I really don't ever see each other, except in passing. We haven't even started xmas shopping. I don't know when we'll find the time since we don't have any days off together. We can't even decide what to get for people. I think it's going to be gift cards this year, lol. I wanted to get a family pic done again for xmas cards but getting Ian, Scott and I all together on the same day is impossible. Not to mention that the boys whine and complain the whole time when we do go.

We will officially not be having anymore puppies :(
Bruno and Patches went under the knife last week and are recovering excellently. They go back on the 14th to get their stitches out. Bruno was his regular self the morning after the surgery, no difference in him! Patches was a little slow at first but has bounced right back only 2 days after surgery.

My next Dr. appt. is on the 14th as well! That's next Thursday. I'm excited to see if the doc got the ultrasound pics from the hospital. If not I'm going to try and convince her to do one in the office while I'm there.

I had a little bit of spotting the other day and couldn't wait to get home and use the doppler. Everything's good. Baby is doing well, no cramping or anything like that to worry about and the spotting was very minimal and went away fast. I guess I'm just growing inside and this might be something I deal with all the way through. Thank god I have the doppler though, it's so comforting!

I think that I felt the baby move the other day but it's still hard to be sure. I guess I won't really know until I can feel the baby move and know that it is truly the baby. I'm excited to start feeling movement regularly. I'm hoping it will happen by Christmas.

Everyone who knows me seems to think it's a girl, but I still feel like it's a boy. Ian thinks it's a girl. I asked him last night if he wanted to wait and not find out and he looked at me like I was crazy, lol. He said NO WAY! I have to know! He told me last week that we need to start setting up the babies room. I told him we had plenty of time before we had to worry about that, to which he replied, "What if it comes early!" LOL This would be too early I told him. I think he's pretty excited.

I think that's about it. No weird cravings or anything. I wish I was eating a little healthier, it's hard at work all week to grab something nutritious for lunch. But I make sure I eat at least 3 meals a day. No weight gain yet, but the belly does look bigger from time to time. I'll try to post another pic soon.

Hello...

Someone here wants to say hi!





HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANA!!

Status report

Still nothing new to report. No changes, the belly doesn't look any bigger, i haven't gained any weight yet. Thanksgiving was great, the food was excellant and we even had left overs from Mom and Dad's that they dropped off to us.
It was a depressing weekend for us because we don't get to spend it as a family. Ian and I had to work and as a result we miss out on our time with Scott. I think we all just miss each other so much right now. Ian and I don't see each other for more than an hour each day. I couldn't tell you when the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than 5 minutes was. It's like we work opposite schedules, If I work late he's asleep when I get home and when he works late I'm a sleep when he gets home. It's like we haven't seen each other in days. We only get one day off a week and it's never the same day for the 2 of us. So that's 3 months with out a day off together. SUCKS!!

No doppler yet. I'm hoping it will come today.

Here's another meme from Stacie's site.

You can only type one word.No explanations.
Yourself: Tired
Your partner: Sick
Your hair: tangled
Your Mother: excited
Your Father: loving
Your Favorite Item: camera
Your dream last night: poop
Your Favorite Drink:milk
Your Dream Car: safe
Your Dream Home: cozy
The Room You Are In: family
Your Ex: gone
Your fear: birth
Where you Want to be in Ten Years? retired
Who you hung out with last night: Scott
What You're Not: relaxed
Muffins: blueberry
One of Your Wish List Items: doppler
Time: ten
The Last Thing You Did:eat
What You Are Wearing: pj's
Your favorite weather: warm
Your Favorite Book: baby
Last thing you ate: banana
Your Life: hectic
Your mood: stress
Your Best Friends: love
What are you thinking about right now: work
Your car: perfect
What are you doing at the moment: typing
Your summer: wonderful
Relationship status: married
What is on your tv: TLC
What is the weather like: freezing
When is the last time you laughed: Thursday

Second Trimester

Well, not much has changed. I'm patiently awaiting our December 14th appointment, it feels like it will take forever to get here.
Nothing much to report, I've been feeling pretty normal. The craving for pizza has subsided a little, although I still love it. Lately I never know what I'm in the mood for. I was craving Captin Crunch cereal for awhile, when I went to the store to buy it I walked out with 3 boxes! Not all Captin Crunch but I just LOVE cereal.
This week I'm craving TURKEY! I wonder why ;) Too bad I won't be getting any :( I have to work on Thanksgiving and then we're going to my in-laws for dinner. My MIL is making cornish hens....I'm sure it will be delicious, but I'd sure love a full belly of turkey with all the fix-in's. I'm going to make a dish of my mother's stuffing recipe, since I don't think Ian or I will survive the day with out it. Now my only hope is that he doesn't eat it all before I get home from work.

My prenatal vitamins make me sick to my stomach so I take them at night before I go to bed. The only problem lately is that I wake up in the middle of the night to go pee and I feel sick. Oh well, I'm loving being prego, although it seems nothing has changed from not being.

We bought a doppler on Ebay. I'm hoping to have it on Friday. If not then we should have it Monday. I can't wait!

Well, that's about it. Like I said nothing really new going on. Here's a belly shot from today.

 

Meet the Doctor

Yesterday was our first appointment to meet our OB. It started out exciting then we waited in the waiting room for an hour! I had to pee so bad but was holding it because I knew that they were going to make me go when they called us back, but after an hour wait I just couldn't hold it anymore. While I'm in the bathroom, I literally flush the toilet and then I can hear the nurse calling my name in the waiting room. Are you kidding me! I knew this was going to happen. I wash my hands and come out and then she says "Oh no you went to the bathroom? We need to get a sample, you should have waited." To which I replied, "Yeah well listen lady, I've been here for an hour waiting to be called back, our appointment was at 10am it's now 11am! Your sample was about to be all over the waiting room floor! I'm sure we probably have another hour ahead of us so I'll be able to go again before we leave." Sure enough I was able to go again before we left, although the doctor did not keep us waiting once we got back to our room.
Our doctor was great. She took her time, answered all our questions and never kept us waiting. We got to hear the heartbeat, which was amazing! She had some trouble finding it at first and I was a little freaked out, she found my pulse and I was even more worried because I knew it was way to slow to be good, if it was the babies. Finally we found my little choo-choo train running strong in there. It was so cute and it really did sound just like a choo-choo train, chugachugachugachugachuga so fast. Once we found the heartbeat and Ian heard it he immediately asked if we could buy a doppler on eBay, lol. I think he was excited. I think that if we had a doppler we would be addicted to listening to the baby everyday. We tried to hear it again last night with a stethoscope, lol. Not going to work.

We won't be getting another ultrasound until around 18 weeks :( But she said that she will try and get us copies of the pictures from the ER so I can't wait for those. If she can't get the copies then she told us that if we're really anxious she could do a bedside ultrasound for us so we might have that done if I can't wait.

I go back on Dec. 14th, I'll be almost 16 weeks by then!! Amazing, I can't wait!

YAY!

I still can't believe it myself. Thank you so much for all your comments. It's so great to know that everyone is so excited for us. Everyday is just a miracle. The first time I had spotting all the way through, never a day with out a little something, so this time it's like everyday I'm in pure joy that nothing's gone wrong.
I'm having some issues with food still. I'm always hungry, but I can't eat a normal amount at one time. I eat a little bit and then I get sick of it so quick, it's weird. I've always loved to eat so this is a bit of a change for me. I'll think I know what I want and then as soon as I have it I take 4 bites and my stomach says "Ok that's enough." What? No it's not. The stomach and I are in a bit of a power struggle.

So I don't know if I wrote this in the last post but we go back to the doctor's on Thursday. This time we actually get to meet the doctor. I'm so excited. We got a list of dates for child birth classes too (they start in March for us) They are at a perfect time so Ian and will both be able to make it after work and meet there. But I don't want to get too far ahead of myself. I'm so afraid of Jinx'ing the whole thing. I've been trying to act like everything is normal, nothing different going on, and every time I think or act pregnant I get paranoid that something will happen.

For now we just keep praying and loving and doing everything we can to keep this baby safe.

11 weeks

 

June 4th

Today was our first appointment. I was so disappointed, we didn't even get to meet the Dr. just talk to the nurse. I thought we would at least get an ultrasound since I'm already 11 weeks. I was excited to have Scott with us so that he could see the ultrasound. He's so excited! I was so nervous about telling him since he's so much older and has been an only child for so long. I wasn't sure how he would react, but he was very excited and happy.

We had a party today for Scott's birthday and told the family. They were all in shock. We decided to have a group photo and Scott said, "Ok, 1,2,3, KARI'S PREGNANT!" Everyone just sort of froze. They weren't sure if he was joking or what.

Cole and Ryleigh are very excited and kept running up to me to tell me that there was a baby in my belly, lol.

Well I'm not sure if we'll be able to get an ultrasound pic again and the ER kept all of the last ones :(

We have an appointment to meet the Dr. next Thursday so I'll keep you posted on what happens next.

4 hours

That we'll never get back.
This morning we went to the ER. The spotting I mentioned in the previous post stopped that same day. However, yesterday morning I awoke to more, redder spotting followed by hysterical crying. Ian and I got ready and tried to call the Dr. but it was too early. So off to the ER we were.
I wasn't in any pain, just terrified and we needed answers.
We got to the ER at 8:45 am. We didn't see a doctor until after 10am and then they did an exam and found no blood! I swear I wasn't crazy, Ian saw it too, it was there. One huge weight lifted, everything seemed to "look" ok. Next it was off to ultrasound. After bloodwork and peeing in the cup. We waited over another hour to get sent to ultrasound.
Finally we get there and there is no Dr. just an ultrasound tech, who was very nice and tried to be as helpful as possible, but he wasn't allowed to tell us anything, because the Dr. had to make the determinations. He could only take the pictures.

Well, we got to see the baby, hear the heart beat, and see the baby moving. It was amazing! I wish I could have seen better, as the screen was on the side of me so the angle was hard to see. I know at one point I saw and arm and hand with fingers, like the baby was waving to say "I'm ok Mom and Dad, don't worry!" At that moment I felt a huge sigh of relief, but I couldn't shake the fact that we still had to wait to hear what the Dr. had to say.
After the ultrasound it was back down to the ER where we waited for well over ANOTHER HOUR! I literally passed out on the exam table and Ian fell asleep in the corner sitting on the floor. It was awful and we were both tired and STARVING!
We finally get the Dr. back in and he said that everything looked great and my HGC levels were very good.

We finally left the ER sometime after 1:30 pm.

I go to the OB next Friday, hopefully we'll get some ultrasound pics that we can keep and share. The hospital kept all the ones from the ER. :(
I hope I can get some more answers and more relief.

Spotting has started

And my breathing has stopped!

I woke up at 1:30am and went to the bathroom and discovered some pink spotting, very little. Thinking I must be dreaming or at least just seeing things I tried to go back to bed and not worry (lol, not worry, yeah right!)
When I got up for the day there was more. Holding back the tears I decided to remain positive and go on with getting ready for the day. There is no cramping so it can't be happening, right?

I read in one of my books that you can experience pink or brownish spotting due to the uterus stretching and not to worry unless it is accompanied by cramping or you see bright red.

As the day went on there was less and less and it turned to more of an orange'ish. Not sure what that means.

Needless to say I am on edge and scarred to death. Please God don't let this happen again! I've been praying all day!

Food

YUCK!
I've been feeling nauseous for the last few weeks, but this week has been terrible! Before, I could just eat a little something and it would subside. This week I don't want to eat. Everything makes me want to vomit. I crave something and then the moment it touches my taste buds my stomach turns. I almost never feel full.
Those who know me, know that I LOVE to eat, so this nausea hasn't exactly slowed me down, but I have wasted a bit of food. Ian's always there to pick up the slack, lol. So for now I eat a little bit of this and a little bit of that, but not a whole lot of one thing. Not too bad.
I'm certainly not complaining, just recording my events. I know that the fact that I feel this way should be a little reassurance that everything is going well inside. Although, I still can't help but be fearful. It still doesn't feel completely real. So weird! I'm hoping that seeing an ultrasound that proves the baby is ok will help it all sink in for me. Apparently the 3 pregnancy tests just aren't enough, lol.

Welcome to 9 weeks!!!

It's official!

Today I went in for my pee test. I'm pregnant! Surprise, surprise, lol. It took about half an hour to get all my info into the computer and then I just pee'd in the cup and they came back with a slip and said "It's positive, give this to the girl at the desk."
That's it! No questions, no advice, no anything. I didn't even get to go into an office or exam room, she told me in the hallway by the waiting room. Kind of odd if you ask me.
Anyway, I gave my slip to the girl and I go back on Nov. 10th for my first appointment. That's Ian's birthday! I hope we get an ultrasound that day although I'm not so sure we will. All they told me was that the appointment will take about an hour that day. I should be 11 weeks by then so I'm hoping we can get it done. What a great birthday present that would be!

I'm thinking of inviting everyone over for Scott's birthday on Saturday (the 11th) and telling them all. But, I am afraid that it will take away from Scott's day. Being an only child, he likes to be the center of attention and his birthday is the one day that is dedicated just for him so I don't want everyone to be excited and talking about the baby and me and Ian and everything else when we should all be focused on celebrating his birthday and not my pregnancy. Although, I'm sure the presents he'll get would help that too.

I guess for now we'll just wait and see what happens, but I defiantly plan on telling Scott Friday (the 10th) after our appointment. Ian and I have been dying to tell him, but he knew first with the last pregnancy and then we had to tell him that it was gone. I just don't want to put him through it if something does go wrong. The older he gets the more questions he'll have and it's just not something that a 12 year old should have to worry about or deal with.

That's it for today. I can't wait for Nov. 10th!!!

Starting 8 weeks!

This is the beginning of week 8. The due date, going by the LMP should be June 1st.

This week while I still have some subconscious lingering of doubt I've actually began to truly get excited. I don't totally expect to see spotting everytime I use the bathroom, but instead I am just so excited that I am pregnant and each time I go I am reassured that I'm still prego.

I feel extremely guilty because I haven't been able to go to the doctor yet because of changing my insurance companies. I should be going on Wednesday since that's my only weekday off for the next 2 weeks. I can't wait to schedule the first ultrasound. I just need to see it to really believe it. I almost feel like buying another tests...just to check. Why is it so hard to believe?

Ian has been incredible! The first night he came home from work with pickles and ice cream. Then just the other night he brought me home a dozen (pink) roses. I think he's bought a different kind of ice cream every other night since we found out. He's trying to fatten me up. I'm trying to eat healthy. It's so hard to eat healthy at work and not spend a fortune. With the puppies and everything else there just isn't time to make a lunch to bring every morning. To get good food out on a lunch break I have to spend nearly $10. That's $50 a week not to mention the $80 in gas and over $20 in tolls right now. Lately I've just been doing the Subway veggie delight. I love Subway and it's cheap but your not supposed to eat lunch meat when prego, so I'm stuck with the veggie delight or cooked subs, which aren't their healthiest variety. I love salads but not McDonald's or Wendy's salads. I think it mostly has to do with the dressing though. Maybe I'll buy my own dressing and try that with the fast food salads to make them better.

Ok, I'm really just endlessly rambling right now so it's time to go...bubye.

Panic and doubt

I've spent the entire week expecting to get my period. I must go to the bathroom 50 times a day, each time certain that I will see blood, and each time...nothing. It's so hard for me to believe this, I guess it's because I want it so badly.
In my first pregnancy it was rare to have one day with no spotting. This time I have everyday with no spotting. It's just unbelieveable. When will I stop doubting my body?